Are You A Good Parent?
Have was young and I had got in trouble during the day. My mother would say “wait until your father comes home.” It was always a long wait and when my father came home, it was usually as bad as I anticipated…as first. As certain as his scary yelling would come it was also just as certain that 20 minutes later he would come and apologize. Needless to say that growing up sith that kind of discipline lead me to become somewhat manipulative of my parents.
A huge mistake that so many moms make is to be inconsistent, especially with discipline. Often times, parents will discipline their children for doing some things wrong, but at other times, they will simply give in to what their children want. Have you ever felt so frustrated with your child during a temper tantrum that you finally just give in to get him/her to stop? Don’t worry. You’re not alone. This is certainly not the best way to curtail this behavior. If you give in one time and not another, not only will your child be confused and feel insecure but future issues will probably become worse as your child thinks, “Wait, I got away with this last time but not this time? So maybe I need to act up even more to get what I want.
Sometimes parents react impulsively (like with giving into a temper tantrum to just get their child to stop) because they feel overwhelmed and emotionally charged. If you are at your wits end, just take a break. Simply let your child know that you are upset or angry with his/her behavior and you need some time alone to think before moving forward. It is also a good idea to recommend that your child think during that time as well. When you exhibit new behavior like this and change to more consistent discipline, it is almost a guarantee that your child will try and test you time and time again until he/she realizes that old habits and methods will no longer work. So it may be discouraging that your child may seem to challenge you even more in the short term. Hang tough though. When you see your child transform to a calm nice kid you will be astonished. When your child is pushing your buttons, remember to stay calm. When you fight back with your child, you are creating a power struggle that will either end you’re your child as the winner or in a fit of anger that can be dangerous. You want to avoid a power struggle between you and your child and remaining calm (and even walking away) will greatly reduce the chances of having a struggle like that. When you handle difficult situations with your child, make sure to point out and praise the positive behavior rather than focusing on the negative behavior. When your child finally exhibits a good behavior after throwing a fit and probably driving you close to insane, point out the good behavior and praise him/her for it.
Tags: 
0 Responses to “Are You A Good Parent?”